Am I not giving enough?
Am I not giving enough?
Ok, I’ve been with my girlfriend for 3 years. We had plotted on getting married and have a child together. For the last three years I have been paying the rent and utilities and have only questioned her to pay for the groceries. My paying also includes a lot of the entertainment outside (eating out) the house and inside (New TV, furniture). I make double what she makes but I don’t require her to pay too much and have stressed for her to pay her debt and bills and just help me a small. Well, none of this seems excellent enough. She complains about me not buying her health insurance, helping her pay her credit cards by paying $5000, and car payment, etc. She had payed quite a bit down since I don’t require her to pay anything besides groceries and phone bill. I tell her if she needs help with a doctor bill or bill issues “just question me” and I will help. She would rather go the accusatory way and make me feel terrible (abuse) instead of being straight forward. I’m simple to work with but feel she is out of control. What should I do?
Many of our discussions and battles seem to be about what I didn’t do, or should have done or could have. It is all about me and what I am not bringing to the plate. I don’t give her this constant stress. She says this is the type of person I am “I will always be up your ass”. She defends herself and makes it ok by saying she had previous boyfriends who seemed ok and laughed it off that she was up their ass and it did not bother them.
The amusing thing is if she just questioned me straight out that she needs help I would be fine but everyone has limitations. I know I have a lot more money saved but my goal was to place a down payment on a house. Well, she says you should of given me some of that money. “How can you let your girlfriend who is in a relationship and going to get married to you be in this debt and have all this money saved and not share it”. I get this instead of “Honey, can you help me out” “Honey, I am tight this month can I borrow some money”. Be nice and I will grant thy wish.
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Tags: 3 years, boyfriends, car payment, credit cards, doctor bill, funny thing, girlfriend, groceries, health insurance, honey, insurance, money, new tv, relationship, stress, tv furniture
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